There are certain times in life, certain circumstances, that simply make you stop. Think. Reflect. The past week has been one of those times for me. Through a series of events and emotions, my heart and my mind were set back in the right direction. The kind of direction that I feel like my stubborn soul needs to be constantly, yet gently, reminded of. This posting is more for me – more of a reminder and place for me to look back and see of what is truly important in my life and how sovereign of a God I serve.
This year, one of my goals that I set was to spend more time in the Word. I am so thankful for Jesus Calling by Sarah Young – what a truth filled devotional! Yesterday’s entry spoke so deeply to my heart and what I have been needing to hear:
“I am a God of both intricate detail and overflowing abundance. When you
entrust the details of your life to Me, you are surprised by how
thoroughly I answer your petitions. I take pleasure in hearing your
prayers, so feel free to bring Me all your requests. The more you pray,
the more answers you can receive. Best of all, your faith is
strengthened as you see how precisely I respond to your specific
Because I am infinite in all My ways, you need not fear that I will run out of resources. Abundance
is at the very heart of who I Am. Come to Me in joyful expectation of
receiving all you need-and sometimes much more! I delight in showering
blessings on My beloved children. Come to Me with open hands and heart,
ready to receive all I have for you.”
Abundance… this can mean so many things. Recently I have been asking the Lord for an abundance of peace and joy. So often I find myself trying to find this abundance in all the wrong things. Current example: Now that my full time job is being a stay at home mom, this urge to have the perfect, well-oiled machine home has increased significantly. There is that word. Perfectionism. Every once in a while I allow that word to creep into my life and take over. And I try to find my abundance in life through trying to become that word, hoping it will bring me the peace and joy I so desire. I get all of these ideas in my head of how my house should look, how my days should go, what needs to be done, etc. What, when, where, why, how…but what about the WHO???
So very often I forget who I am serving. Who created me. Who designed me to be a wife and a mother. And who I am blessed to have here in my home to care for. God cares so deeply about what my heart desires. He wants me to come to Him and make my requests known to Him. He takes pleasure in hearing my prayers and answering them. So why is it, that so many times I try and make everything happen perfectly myself? At the end of the day, the laundry can wait, the dishes can sit in the sink a while longer and dinner doesn’t have to be hot and ready on the table right when Eric gets home from work. What really matters is who is right in front of me – am I readily available to spend hours on the floor with Nora helping her figure out how to turn the pages of a book? Am I ready with a tender spirit to sit up and rock my teething child at 2 am? Am I finding joy in welcoming my husband home after a rough day of climbing trees in the cold? But mostly am I using the gifts and time that God gave me to show His peace and joy to these two people I call my most beloved?
So instead of obsessing over my to-do lists, workouts and every other thing that can consume my mind, I am going to lay it all down at the foot of the cross and find my abundance of peace and joy in everything that the Lord wants to give me. I don’t want to miss a single moment of what God has for me to encounter with the two most precious people in my life -my husband and my daughter. I love them both so much, that I can’t even put it into words.
this morning, I will embrace the extra time with her, rather than think
through all of the things that I could have gotten done while she was